Your Path or the Guru's Path
Following up from the last article “When the Door to Discover Yourself Opens”, if you experienced this, it is also a period when you feel confused, lost and want to seek guidance from more experienced teachers.
Spiritual, Healing and Self-Help
In the spiritual, healing and self-help industry, there are organisations and/or individuals who brand themselves as enlightened beings which we term “Guru” in this article.
Usually, their main target audience are the people whose door to discover themselves have recently opened. These people are at a point of re-examining their lives, seeking direction, guidance and spiritual growth.
Meanwhile, the Gurus and their organisations fulfill this hunger by promising future enlightenment and a fulfilling and purposeful life if you follow them, take their programmes, join their activities and practice their rituals, practices and recommended lifestyles diligently and without question.
A motto to establish the Guru’s superiority and an obedient and loyal following could be along the lines of:
You don’t know as much as me (the Guru), so don’t think too much. Do as I say, empty your cup and learn from me, and you will see the results.
Following a Guru
If you decide to follow a spiritual Guru (or spiritual leader, enlightened leader, organisation or equivalent) as a way to find your own path, there are few things to watch out for.
1) Your Inner State
You are re-examining yourself and possibly re-opening the past and uncovering deep inner thoughts and feelings. In this state, you would be open and influenceable. While you may get a clearer sense of your path, you are also vulnerable to confuse or even combine your path with the Guru’s or organisation’s path.
This is especially so if the spiritual Guru or organisation has a strong agenda to:
- grow the organisation’s size, profits and presence
- gain recognition and power
- develop a devoted and loyal following
To understand the Stages of Involvement with these Gurus, read here.
2) Your Path
As an individual soul, your path is unique. Your path is related to your own inner calling, inner motivations and life purpose.
In life, signs and decisions related to your path show up in little ways, such as childhood interests, hobbies, certain topics that catch your interest and skills or problems that people come to you for. Your decisions, natural and developed strengths and weaknesses, relationships and networks also reflect your unique path.
3) If Your Path Aligns with the Guru’s Path
It is important to note that your path may or may not align with the organisation’s objectives.
If it is not aligned, you can pause and discontinue further activities or programmes with the Guru. Contrary to what they may say, not becoming a follower does not mean that you are “unconscious”, “bad” or “unwilling” to do the inner work.
For some, you may feel aligned and compelled to contribute to the Guru and Guru’s organisation and activities as a way to pursue your path and develop yourself.
If you find yourself serving in the Guru’s path and organisation as a way to walk your path, it is important that you continue to remain authentic to your inner self.
Losing Yourself when Following a Guru
If the Guru has other power-driven agendas, followers may be influenced to feel that they are less knowledgeable and less powerful than the Guru. They believe the Guru’s presence, knowledge and teachings to be superior. They may even unconsciously dismiss their own thoughts/emotions, and start taking on the persona, thinking and emotional patterns, relationship beliefs and even life preferences and habits of the Guru and the Guru’s organisation.
The Guru’s Influence on Your Path
If the Guru’s path aligns with yours in some way, you might feel inspired to grow and learn from this Guru. You might even want to create a similar path for yourself as this Guru and help others in their inner work.
However, if the Guru and Guru’s organisation have a strong agenda, do watch for the tendency to link the organisation’s agenda to your path, through arguments like:
- “By joining our activities, you are doing the inner work.”
- “We provide you with the environment and guidance to develop yourself so that you can fulfill your own goals.”
- “Volunteering / assisting here is a more affordable alternative to taking more programmes.”
- “How much you gain depends on you and your intentions.”
- “This is an intentional and mindful space for you.”
- “This is a way to accelerate your growth towards your goals”
- “Without us, you would be slacking and not progress in your inner work.”
- “Do you want to continue being stuck, just like before you joined us? To progress, join my programmes or assist me in the sessions”
- “How much you apply and really improve your life is up to you.”
Many followers believe that by pursuing the organisation’s agenda, they are also developing and fulfilling their own consciousness and spiritual path. Believing that they are unable to do it on their own, followers may also become dependent on the organisation’s activities and Guru’s teachings to feel that they are progressing and doing something meaningful.
This creates a devoted following. Followers would put in all their efforts to serve and promote the Guru’s or organisation’s agenda. All these contribute to the growth and success of the Guru and Guru’s organisation.
Your Path or the Guru’s Path
For some followers, they may start to feel a growing misalignment with the Guru, organisation and teachings.
Misalignment happens when your inner self starts to mature.
You begin to require a different environment (outside of the Guru and organisation’s umbrella) to grow and flourish in your unique path. If and when this happens, it is normal and okay to move to a next phase.
It simply means it is time for you to spread your wings, leave the nest and fly.
However, leaving the Guru and Guru’s Path may be difficult as there could be questions of your loyalty, your usefulness and self-worth, and your commitment to the inner work or spiritual path. You may also lose your friends in the organisation who perceive you to be an ‘enemy’, a ‘strayed member’ or ‘traitor’.
Option 1: Choosing the Guru’s Path
At this point, if you fall prey to the guilt-tripping, loyalty-based arguments and fear of continuing on your path alone, you may continue to serve in the Guru’s path out of obligation and fear, instead of taking the learnings and training to move forward onto your unique path.
Option 2: Choosing Your Path
If your inner voice gets stronger and you decide to follow your own intuition to set out on your own path, you may find yourself distancing from the Guru and the Guru’s organisation.
At the beginning, you may feel alone, doubtful and afraid, as the ‘safe’ umbrella of the Guru and organisation are no longer with you. It is okay.
Hear your inner voice and learn to trust it more.
As you walk further on your path, the trust and confidence in yourself will grow. You may find new interests, discover alternative ways and methods, and develop your own style.
You may also begin to question and evaluate the thought patterns, relationship dynamics and emotional reactions learnt when you were with your Guru. You may find some useful, and some unsuitable for you.
This is when you begin to gain autonomy and develop your own style of thinking, perceiving, feeling and relating. Now you are walking on your path for real.
